5 Great Things About Giving Up Porn


I love myself

It usually takes around 4-6 months of sex addiction recovery. Suddenly you realize you’re not thinking about sex all the time, the cravings to go on the computer have subsided, and your brain gets “rebooted” to stabilize all those rambid  crazy neutrotransmitters you’ve been abusing when viewing porn.   Could it be that you feel — normal?

There are some tremendous things that happen to clients I’ve work with when this happens.

  1. You don’t have to hide or live in shame.  The double life is gone.  You don’t have to fret about being caught by your spouse.  You no longer have to erase your history or your cookies.  You can stop worrying about losing your relationship if you’re caught. Knowing that you’ve been duplicitous in your relationship disrupts the closeness and intimacy you feel.  If you make a mistake, you can admit it.  You don’t always have to feel defensive.  The best thing is that you don’t have to keep it straight in your mind what you say and don’t say.  You’re free to disclose the unvarnished truth in all your relationships.  It’s called integrity.
  2. Your health gets better because you’re taking better care of yourself.  You’re sleeping at night rather than being up all night looking at the computer.  You remember to eat regular meals.  With the extra time you have from not spending 5-6 hours a night in the “erotic haze”, you have time to get some exercise.
  3. You feel like you’re married to the woman you’re married to.  You know you’ve been terribly neglecting her, don’t you?  And she’s missed you something awful.  That problem you had with porn-induced erectile dysfunction is gone and you’re actually having (and enjoying) person-to-person sex with a person you cherish.  The sex isn’t just physical.  There’s an emotional element to it.  When it’s over, you don’t feel like you want the floor to open up and have you fall into it.  You actually feel good.  Close.  Nurtured.  Cared for.
  4. You get your friends and family back in your life.  Sex and porn addiction is an isolating condition.  When you were constantly preoccupied with getting your next “high”, or when you spent hours on end isolating looking at porn, you had no interest in being with other people because, guess what?  They might want to talk about themselves and you were so self-obsessed that you didn’t want to hear it.  You’re starting to care about people again.
  5.  You find yourself becoming interested in the things you used to be interested in before you fell down the rabbit hole.  Community service.  Jogging. Going for long rides in the car with the family just for the fun of it.  Spending time with the kids. Making a spectacular Christmas.  Participating in preparing meals.  Snorkeling. Reading a good book.  Dancing a slow dance with your wife with the lights down low in the living room.  Watching the sun go down.

The loss of control, the secrets, the hiding, and the shame, of God, the shame, is gone.  Sex addiction therapy has taught you a few things about how to put boundaries on your sexual energies but also how to forgive yourself and get on with the business of living.

Dorothy Hayden, LCSW, 209 E. 10th St. #14, NYC NY

For a Free 30-Minute Phone Consultation, Call 212-673-5717

www.sextreatment.com

 

 

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: