How to Stop Looking at Porn

Let’s admit it, there are a large percentage of people today who are addicted to pornography. What once started as a magazine affair has exploded into a widespread addiction with the introduction of the internet. This introduction allowed pornography to become easily accessible to any age group, and can allow younger audiences to succumb to an addiction.

 

Of the two sexes, men are probably most easily tempted to succumb to a pornography addiction. From my understanding as a guy, it seems that men are easier targets because we are usually attracted to visual stimuli. For example, men are more prone to be attracted to women who are visually stimulating. Women on the other hand are more emotionally driven and are attracted to men who are caring and have an interest in them. Looks for women, although important, are secondary.

It is not surprising that men are more addicted to pornography than women based on their visual programming, however what can appear to be a harmless activity can lead to an addiction. For example, let’s say Jim starts looking at internet pornography at the young age of eight. Even though he is young, Jim continues to look at porn off and on for eight more years.

At the age of sixteen, Jim is prone to several consequences. For example, since Jim has looked at porn for eight years, he risks dehumanizing women to mere images. Even worse, he may degrade the looks of women who are his age and may risk categorizing them to a “scale” based on his pornography addiction. So let’s say that Jim sees Sally, a naturally attractive female, and simply reduces her to an artificial scale that is impossible for her to stand up to. He ignores her, and risks isolating himself.

If this does not sound like a big deal, it really is. Rather than being attracted to women based on natural looks, Jim risks categorizing women based on artificial standards. Even worse, Jim risks only selecting a small minority of women who are based on an artificial scale which may lead him to not finding a partner.

Another thing that hurts Jim is if he is in a relationship now. What is most devastating about pornography is that men and women are simply looking at the images of people and using them simply as images. Rather than taking that person as a person, Jim or Jill are using these images to accomplish one task as a means to an end. If Jim is dating a person, and he looks at pornography, he is not only hurting himself but he is also hurting his partner.

So what can Jim do about his addiction? The process is very hard when overcoming an addiction, however probably the best way to cope with it is to follow a series of steps.

Step 1: Obtain an accountability software program 
These days, there are several free software programs that can allow people to have accountability partners. For example, let’s say that Jim is trying to boot his addiction. He can ask his girlfriend, Jill, to be an accountability partner that will receive occasional status updates regarding his internet activity. This can be a great way to allow Jim to stop looking at porn due to the probable wrath he would receive from Jill if he was looking at porn.

Step 2: Avoid situations that would help promote the temptation to look at porn 
In today’s age, it is very difficult to avoid imagery that demotes both sexes. From Victoria Secret commercials to billboards, individuals today are often tempted to place people based on looks. For example, let’s say you watch a movie and treated to a particular scene that is not good in the imagery department. That one scene may urge you to look at pornography which is exactly what you don’t want to do.

An easy way to fix this is to avoid looking at things that may tempt you. From novels, to movies, to even commercials, try to immediately avoid these situations, or if you cannot just look away! I know this is difficult, but try to train your mind (and eyes) to avoid these events!

Step 3: You will mess up 
You cannot get rid of your addiction completely. For example, I still struggle with my pornography addiction, and it is a work in process. I mess up all the time, however I keep trying to eliminate this dreaded addiction by realizing that I have a loving girlfriend that loves me and that looking at pornography will hurt both of us.

With this in mind, when you mess up, try to find solutions that will help you in the future. For example, ask yourself what went wrong. Did you look at a movie you really shouldn’t have been looking at? Were you reading an erotic novel? Were you looking at fashion magazines? Try to realize and fix these things to avoid them in the future.

Step 4: Tell the truth to your accountability partner. 
The person you place as an accountability partner is one who is supposed to be there for you. Whether it is your girlfriend, boyfriend, parent, or just a friend, remember that they will be there for you. Tell the truth to your accountability partner so that they can help you through your addiction. Rely on these trusted individuals in dire situations such as when you encounter urges that may lead you to looking at pornography. Call them if you are having an urge and they will most likely be there for you!

In conclusion, fighting an addiction to pornography is very difficult. Use these four steps to learn how to fight your addiction. It will be hard, however stay true to yourself and have an accountable partner that will help you along the way.

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